Zulu Up to No Good

Sometimes when I hear Amarula crying at the door for mom to let her in, I think of alerting mom to her pleas. But then I remember how Amarula always makes fun of Biltong and me and then I start to caterwaul to drown out Amarula’s cries! Mom thinks I’m a real poet and just love to express myself! Hee hee

zulu laughing

Biltong even helps me caterwaul:

billsinging

 

We are so funny!

billylaughting

 

 

Winter Has Come Again!?

snow

AMARULA: What’s that you say? This winter thing happens EVERY year?! I wouldn’t have believed it until the snow hit the ground. The cold air and wet snow have relegated me to life indoors again and that means that I am forced to spend time with the kittens. And just as expected, I find them as engaging and intelligent as cardboard. I mean seriously, are we sure these two are even sentient?

I try to hide from them even in mom’s desk (being nincompoops, the kittens don’t like to be near objects associated with the exercise of intellect like desks, books and such)

hide in desk

But no matter where I hide…

ama in her happy place pre-zulu

They find me…

 

ama wacking zulu full claws

Nowhere is safe…

billyandama

Pray for me!

amapraying

 

 

Nemesis of the Month: Furniture

AMARULA: My nemesis of the month is furniture! Not just any furniture, but items that are low to the ground, like sofas and corner-cupboards. So low that you can’t get under them to retrieve your toys and are forced to wait until The Human finally notices all the playthings are missing! When will this human-centric world finally understand the need for feline-friendly furniture!?

missing balls (2)

Will No One Rescue Me?

…It has been six minutes now that I have been attached to the tree. Clearly another plot of the neighborhood gang of squirrels to kill me. They must have put crazy glue on the tree trunk in an effort to capture me here until I starve to death. It is likely sleep deprivation will spell my end. It has been 10 minutes since my last seven-hour nap and I don’t know how much longer I can last…where is my silly human when you actually need her? Pray for me…

ama up a tree-crop

The Squirrels are Plotting to Ruin Me

AMARULA: Alright, alright. It has come to my attention that there is a rumor going around the cat community in my neighborhood that I have been spotted running FROM a squirrel. I am here to dispel that ridiculous rumor! ME! Running from a squirrel!?? I survived the mean streets of Cape Town, South Africa for years before that human, Sandra, came along and “rescued” me off to Canada. I am certainly not going to turn in terror from a fat and furry rodent with a puffy tail! You can’t imagine the beating my reputation as the feline who put the “tude” in “Tortitude” is taking from these laughable lies! Even mangy “Fragile Frank” the skittish Cornish Rex down the street has taken to laughing and pointing as I strut by!

I will admit the so-called photographic “evidence” of me skedaddling from a squirrel does make it a little more difficult for me to explain my behavior–but explain I will:

Here, in the first photo, what looks to be me frozen in terror is actually me cleverly lulling the rodent into a false sense of security:

amarula and sq

Here, now that I have tricked the squirrel into thinking he is safe, I survey the situation and wait for the best moment to attack:

amaandsq3

I go into stealth mode, ready for my infamous and deadly I-never-saw-it-coming pounce:

amaandsq2

Now in this photo, what APPEARS to be me reconsidering my position and running rapidly towards home, is actually me turning to go after a gang of racoons—much bigger and more aggressive prey that are more worthy of my power-pounce! Sadly, my enemies have cleverly Photoshopped them out of the photo in their scurrilous efforts to defame me! But you can trust me, really! There was a gang of raccoons that I beat into submission and saved the day!

amagivesup